Black Scintellescence

Almost everything we do today is connected to something that happened in the past. 

Your reactions, your fears, your style… 

Your need for validation. Your inability to trust…

Your people pleasing. Your fear of abandonment. 

Many of these things were shaped long before you become an adult. They were shaped by the child you once were. 

Some of us are still trying to earn love we should have received when we were kids. 

Having lost both parents, I personally will try forever to earn an “I’m proud of you”

You may be trying so hard to feel important 

Trying so hard to feel safe 

Trying so hard to get someone to notice us. 

And without realizing it, we spend our adult lives chasing what our younger selves never received.

This portrait is titled 'becoming'. You can see that the figure is turned away from us. There is no face to read, no eyes to meet, and no expression to explain what is happening. The drama appears to be internal, which makes the body feel less like a portrait and more like a question. 

What interests me is not the strength the back seems to have, but what the back itself suggests. You could see the burden of years, experience accumulated beneath the skin, and the invisible weight of awareness, things you cannot deny not understanding. 

Perhaps becoming begins when a person notices that time has been shaping them all along. You must ask yourself, am I  becoming who I intended to be? Am I the person I wrote that letter to as a child? Am I still the leader of tomorrow? or am I merely the consequence of unused potential?